Well I have to go see a specialist. When the put the contrast into my uterus the test only showed the left side fallopian tube, no right side fallopian tube, and only a tiny amount of uterus on the left side. The dr has referred me to a specialist (unfortunately insurance will not pay for this so its all self pay) who will go in and look to see what is going on with a camera. There are a few things that it could be:
1) Unicornuate uterus - this means I could only have a uterus and fallopian tube on the left side with a very small thin uterus. This will make pregnancy very dangerous, will have to be monitored constantly, bed rest, very high chance of miscarriage, and there will have to be an early term C-section for safety of both baby and me
2) Bicornuate uterus - this means I have 2 seperate uterine areas separated by a septum, require surgery for removal of septum, drugs to try to prevent scar tissue build up, drugs to then induce pregnancy, C-section
3) Fibroid Tumor - I think this one is pretty self explanatory though probably needs saying its benign just blocking the tube
It may even be something else but those are the things the dr talked over with me. Pretty much I can get pregnant but if I do so I will miscarry 99% of the time with a high chance of bad things happening to me too. I guess I have been lucky that so far I only lost the babies and not been hospitalized. Also pregnancy in the future will most likely be high risk and will always require a C-section do to possible complications. I have an appointment on the 19th with the specialist.
I have decided to really focus on my fiber business because I need to put my energy and focus into something that I can control right now. I can go to drs for this but really there is only so much I can do against mother nature. While I am not ready to just throw in the towel yet I just have to have something else take most of my focus up right now or I will go insane. I am not sure what I would do if I did not have my fiber and yarn to fall back on. The people in my group on ravelry and who I have met because of my fiber and yarn are really the ones who have been helping through this time. I have to give something back to them and to myself, even if its only to keep moving forward with it and not to give up. *hugs to all*
Friday, May 13, 2011
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
TTC, Dr asked me to come into the office tomorrow.
The nagging doubt and worry is now very increased as the dr has told me everything over the phone including the miscarriage. Maybe its nothing but my brain is now on overdrive waiting for my 2:30pm appointment.
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
Latest on the TTC front: Hysterosalpingogram - very detailed so avoid if squimish!
I figure this could use repeating: This is on the TTC front: Hysterosalpingogram - very detailed so avoid if squimish!
I went to the dr today for the Hysterosalpingogram. It was uncomfortable but not too painful. The details of the procedure for those of you who may have to have this done or for those of you who are just interested. I was not actually sure what was going to happen. From WebMD:
What that means is that they put you on a regular X-ray table that they have just added stir-ups to (its sounding fun already right?) then tell you to sort of hang your butt off the table. Now this is not like your friendly and comfortable OBGYN tables (wait did I really just say friendly and comfortable?? well comparatively yes.. yes they are because they have padding and the stir ups extend a bit). The table here is just metal with a sheet on it and the stir ups are straight up on the end of the table.
To perform this maneuver I was reminded of much younger days when I had to pee outside after having drunk a whole lot (way too much at a club) once which was to say very clumsy, unorganized, hanging over the edge of something not meant for that purpose and I think things ended up in areas that they really should not have been. Also people where seeing bits of my body that are normally not shown in public while they gave me advice on how to accomplish the task better. "Scoot down a bit more" "Hang over just a little bit more" "lean just a bit" "lift your leg here" "wiggle this way" "woops its just plastic" Ahh the good old days (nooooo!!!!! end embarrassing flashback) Those were actually things said during the procedure today and Im not kidding there. It is sort of funny if you think about it. The things we go through in the name of medicine and health.
Now at this point I am just now getting into position and the dr tells me he will probably end up pinching me with the speculum. Also the dye will feel like heavy cramping. Im prepared, ok here we go. Here goes the tube, it is uncomfortable but its ok. Wait what the heck are you doing down there? Oh you are filling a balloon??? No one mentioned this balloon. (BTW the balloon filling is actually the most painful part and its still only feels like really bad cramps). Now speculum is in, the tube is in, balloon is filled, and now with all this in place I must carefully take my legs off the stirups, pull my butt back on the table, and scoot up so they can put the dye in and hurry up and snap X rays.
That part Im certain was funny as all get out if I could have observed it from another vantage point. It took myself, the doctor and one tech to get this accomplished. Once in place the photos took only minutes. They checked took a few more and then took it all out. Told me to wear a pad due to spotting. Told me to watch out for pain, fever, heavy bleeding, chills, other signs of infection. If they happen call the dr or go to the ER. They are rare but still must mention them. Also as they were looking over these tests the dr asked if I have had a CAT scan or MRI of the area. I told him no and asked why? He said he was just checking. That part makes me nervous because after all this time I have found that drs rarely just ask a question out of curiosity.
I should have the results in a few days. This will tell me if there are any blockages of my fallopian tubes or abnormal shaping of my uterine lining causing issues with implantation. On a highly positive note the tech told me that if everything turns out ok with the tests often times the contrast used to get the photos does a wonderful cleaning out of the tubes and pregnancy is usually easier in the future. So thats my story for today's dr visit. Hopeful but a bit nervous is how Im feeling. *hugs to all as usual*
I went to the dr today for the Hysterosalpingogram. It was uncomfortable but not too painful. The details of the procedure for those of you who may have to have this done or for those of you who are just interested. I was not actually sure what was going to happen. From WebMD:
A hysterosalpingogram (HSG) is an X-ray test that looks at the inside of the uterus and fallopian tubes and the area around them. It often is done for women who are having a hard time becoming pregnant (infertile).
During a hysterosalpingogram, a dye (contrast material) is put through a thin tube that is put through the vagina and into the uterus. Because the uterus and the fallopian tubes are hooked together, the dye will flow into the fallopian tubes. Pictures are taken using a steady beam of X-ray (fluoroscopy) as the dye passes through the uterus and fallopian tubes.
What that means is that they put you on a regular X-ray table that they have just added stir-ups to (its sounding fun already right?) then tell you to sort of hang your butt off the table. Now this is not like your friendly and comfortable OBGYN tables (wait did I really just say friendly and comfortable?? well comparatively yes.. yes they are because they have padding and the stir ups extend a bit). The table here is just metal with a sheet on it and the stir ups are straight up on the end of the table.
To perform this maneuver I was reminded of much younger days when I had to pee outside after having drunk a whole lot (way too much at a club) once which was to say very clumsy, unorganized, hanging over the edge of something not meant for that purpose and I think things ended up in areas that they really should not have been. Also people where seeing bits of my body that are normally not shown in public while they gave me advice on how to accomplish the task better. "Scoot down a bit more" "Hang over just a little bit more" "lean just a bit" "lift your leg here" "wiggle this way" "woops its just plastic" Ahh the good old days (nooooo!!!!! end embarrassing flashback) Those were actually things said during the procedure today and Im not kidding there. It is sort of funny if you think about it. The things we go through in the name of medicine and health.
Now at this point I am just now getting into position and the dr tells me he will probably end up pinching me with the speculum. Also the dye will feel like heavy cramping. Im prepared, ok here we go. Here goes the tube, it is uncomfortable but its ok. Wait what the heck are you doing down there? Oh you are filling a balloon??? No one mentioned this balloon. (BTW the balloon filling is actually the most painful part and its still only feels like really bad cramps). Now speculum is in, the tube is in, balloon is filled, and now with all this in place I must carefully take my legs off the stirups, pull my butt back on the table, and scoot up so they can put the dye in and hurry up and snap X rays.
That part Im certain was funny as all get out if I could have observed it from another vantage point. It took myself, the doctor and one tech to get this accomplished. Once in place the photos took only minutes. They checked took a few more and then took it all out. Told me to wear a pad due to spotting. Told me to watch out for pain, fever, heavy bleeding, chills, other signs of infection. If they happen call the dr or go to the ER. They are rare but still must mention them. Also as they were looking over these tests the dr asked if I have had a CAT scan or MRI of the area. I told him no and asked why? He said he was just checking. That part makes me nervous because after all this time I have found that drs rarely just ask a question out of curiosity.
I should have the results in a few days. This will tell me if there are any blockages of my fallopian tubes or abnormal shaping of my uterine lining causing issues with implantation. On a highly positive note the tech told me that if everything turns out ok with the tests often times the contrast used to get the photos does a wonderful cleaning out of the tubes and pregnancy is usually easier in the future. So thats my story for today's dr visit. Hopeful but a bit nervous is how Im feeling. *hugs to all as usual*
Sunday, May 8, 2011
I decided to try out a new blog layout & I will be Vending in Jackson, MI July 30
Of course now I have no idea how to get the old one back so hopefully yall like this one *grin* I will probably fiddle with it a bit more but I like the colors of it. Also I wanted to announce that I will be vending at the 2nd Annual Wine and Wool Festival
at Sandhill Crane Vineyards July 30, 2011 11:00 am to 6:00 pm. This is located Jackson, MI for anyone nearby there who would like to pop over and say hello! This is now 2 whole events for the summer think I can find a few more to fill up my fall? If anyone has something they think would be fun, a good fit, nearby let me know ok!
at Sandhill Crane Vineyards July 30, 2011 11:00 am to 6:00 pm. This is located Jackson, MI for anyone nearby there who would like to pop over and say hello! This is now 2 whole events for the summer think I can find a few more to fill up my fall? If anyone has something they think would be fun, a good fit, nearby let me know ok!
Getting to the Post office - stressful but amusing!
So a funny thing happened to me on the way to the post office. Well several (I did eventually get there but not until Sat) actually. Friday I got up bright and early and went to the garage. I wanted to send out some other packages as well so I went to work on them. I was chugging along, feeling good and feeling accomplished. I figured I will go to the post office after lunch. Tom had took our car to work because Wanda told me I could borrow her jeep, because her hubby was taking his car to work. Everyone following me now? Great!
Lunch time comes and I am still working with a batt on the carder. I stop to get a coffee and take a break when I realize the time. Rik (Wanda's hubby) is about to head back to work because he comes home for lunch. He goes out to the car as I sit down on the porch with my coffee and his car won't start. At all. Lots of noisy noise but no starting. I am now starting to panic a bit on the inside but trying not to let it show because they are the ones having some car trouble and I just need to get to the post office. If he can't get it working he will have to take his jeep back to work and I will not have a car to get to the post office. It wont be the end of the world but I have already missed a week of getting to the post office. He works on the car for about 20-30 minutes and he is able to get it started and off to work he goes.
I finish my coffee with a sigh of relief and go inside to take the batt I had been working with off the carder and put it in a bag. Then I go to print a label for it. My printer starts making this horrible grinding noise for about 30 seconds and then the power shuts off. I turn the power back on open it up, nothings stuck, no paper jam so I try to print again, same thing happens. We do this about 3 times and I am starting to say forget it(well that's the censored version) because this package can just wait. Then it actually starts printing. I am ready to cheer because I have a love hate relationship with my printer. Halfway through printing the page the ink runs out. I am now ready to use something (like one of the very large hammers or possibly the chainsaw) to turn my printer into little bitty bits. My friend Wanda discourages this course of action because it will damage the chainsaw. I decide I am just going to the post office and I will pick up ink while I am out.
All of a sudden it occurs to me as I am thinking about the packages that I forgot to put in the stitch markers from Yarndemon. The stitch markers that she made just for the I'll Drink to That SAL/KAL. Not only that I have no idea where I have put them. The time is now about 1pmish. I think there is still plenty of time to find them and get them into the packages and still make the post office. I am thinking how lucky I am that I actually remembered before I shipped them. So I try to think about where I have put them... I start pacing, looking on shelves, moving boxes. I come inside and look there. I go back out to the garage and look some more there. I am now so frustrated that I really want to cry like a baby because I can't find the stitch markers and I am not sending these packages with out them. I have waited this long to send a perfect package and Im going to send a perfect package... Pace.. pace.. pace.. Move boxes.. pace.. lift things.. pace.. kick desk.. pace..
Tom texts. He is still at work but while on break he went out to the car and has locked the keys inside. So now I have to take the spare key to him. I stop looking for the box of stitch markers that I can not find (it is now after 3pm and the post office is closed btw it is actually about 4:30pm now and I have been looking for those stitch markers for awhile) and I go to take him the key. I get half way there and realize I have forgotten the key. It is still hanging in the closet. At this point I just start laughing. I turn around and get the key to take to Tom. I also got ink for the printer and Tom grabbed pizza for dinner so we ended up relaxing sort of the rest of the night. I still could not find the stitch markers. I had decided I was just going to send the packages with out them on Sat.
I woke up Sat morning and remembered right where I put the box of stitch markers. I took Tom to work then came home to get them (I am not taking any chances today). This is where it gets really funny. See I left them in the priority box that Anita sent them in to protect them. Then so I would not forget them I put them in the packages I put them in my shipping area for safe keeping. They were with the packages all along but hidden because they looked like one of the packages I was sending out. So all the packages got reopened, I added the stitch markers and then repackaged them. Then I because I knew the post office closed at noon and Tom got off work at 12:30ish I played around with my carder for a bit and then headed out at around 11. This turned out to be good because I got to the post office at 11:21. They actually close at 11:30. The good new is the packages have all shipped! The really good news is The Packages Have All Shipped With Everything They Were Supposed to Have!!!
Because of only having one vehicle and working a part time temporary job I am currently only able to ship packages on Friday and Saturday. In the future though I think it will not be this eventful! I will be posting photos of the batts and yarn for the I'll drink to that Sal/Kal as soon as they packages start arriving to maintain the surprise.
Lunch time comes and I am still working with a batt on the carder. I stop to get a coffee and take a break when I realize the time. Rik (Wanda's hubby) is about to head back to work because he comes home for lunch. He goes out to the car as I sit down on the porch with my coffee and his car won't start. At all. Lots of noisy noise but no starting. I am now starting to panic a bit on the inside but trying not to let it show because they are the ones having some car trouble and I just need to get to the post office. If he can't get it working he will have to take his jeep back to work and I will not have a car to get to the post office. It wont be the end of the world but I have already missed a week of getting to the post office. He works on the car for about 20-30 minutes and he is able to get it started and off to work he goes.
I finish my coffee with a sigh of relief and go inside to take the batt I had been working with off the carder and put it in a bag. Then I go to print a label for it. My printer starts making this horrible grinding noise for about 30 seconds and then the power shuts off. I turn the power back on open it up, nothings stuck, no paper jam so I try to print again, same thing happens. We do this about 3 times and I am starting to say forget it(well that's the censored version) because this package can just wait. Then it actually starts printing. I am ready to cheer because I have a love hate relationship with my printer. Halfway through printing the page the ink runs out. I am now ready to use something (like one of the very large hammers or possibly the chainsaw) to turn my printer into little bitty bits. My friend Wanda discourages this course of action because it will damage the chainsaw. I decide I am just going to the post office and I will pick up ink while I am out.
All of a sudden it occurs to me as I am thinking about the packages that I forgot to put in the stitch markers from Yarndemon. The stitch markers that she made just for the I'll Drink to That SAL/KAL. Not only that I have no idea where I have put them. The time is now about 1pmish. I think there is still plenty of time to find them and get them into the packages and still make the post office. I am thinking how lucky I am that I actually remembered before I shipped them. So I try to think about where I have put them... I start pacing, looking on shelves, moving boxes. I come inside and look there. I go back out to the garage and look some more there. I am now so frustrated that I really want to cry like a baby because I can't find the stitch markers and I am not sending these packages with out them. I have waited this long to send a perfect package and Im going to send a perfect package... Pace.. pace.. pace.. Move boxes.. pace.. lift things.. pace.. kick desk.. pace..
Tom texts. He is still at work but while on break he went out to the car and has locked the keys inside. So now I have to take the spare key to him. I stop looking for the box of stitch markers that I can not find (it is now after 3pm and the post office is closed btw it is actually about 4:30pm now and I have been looking for those stitch markers for awhile) and I go to take him the key. I get half way there and realize I have forgotten the key. It is still hanging in the closet. At this point I just start laughing. I turn around and get the key to take to Tom. I also got ink for the printer and Tom grabbed pizza for dinner so we ended up relaxing sort of the rest of the night. I still could not find the stitch markers. I had decided I was just going to send the packages with out them on Sat.
I woke up Sat morning and remembered right where I put the box of stitch markers. I took Tom to work then came home to get them (I am not taking any chances today). This is where it gets really funny. See I left them in the priority box that Anita sent them in to protect them. Then so I would not forget them I put them in the packages I put them in my shipping area for safe keeping. They were with the packages all along but hidden because they looked like one of the packages I was sending out. So all the packages got reopened, I added the stitch markers and then repackaged them. Then I because I knew the post office closed at noon and Tom got off work at 12:30ish I played around with my carder for a bit and then headed out at around 11. This turned out to be good because I got to the post office at 11:21. They actually close at 11:30. The good new is the packages have all shipped! The really good news is The Packages Have All Shipped With Everything They Were Supposed to Have!!!
Because of only having one vehicle and working a part time temporary job I am currently only able to ship packages on Friday and Saturday. In the future though I think it will not be this eventful! I will be posting photos of the batts and yarn for the I'll drink to that Sal/Kal as soon as they packages start arriving to maintain the surprise.
Thursday, May 5, 2011
I am teaching a Fiber Prep Workshop Jun 4
I am so very excited and I just can not contain myself. I have set the details up and I will be teaching a Fiber Prep Workshop on Jun 4th at Enchanted Yarn and Fiber at their new location at 2327 Madison St, Clarksville, TN. Here is the blurb that was in the newsletter:
Fiber Prep Class with Johanna Spalding
One Session – June 4th (Saturday)
Time: 10:00 – 3:00
Class fee: $30.00 paid to Instructor
Class size limited to 10 students.
This session includes an informative and detailed lecture on different methods of preparing wool. The session turns into a hands-on class as students will have the opportunity to use cards, carders and hand combs to create batts and roving. Don’t miss this opportunity to learn how and why certain processes are necessary to prepare fibers.
Samples of completed batts and roving will also be available to view and purchase.
I am just so excited and wanted to share this with everyone. Today I am feeling very much alive and feeling great! I have some really good ideas I can not wait until the weekend to work on! I hope everyone has a great weekend!
Fiber Prep Class with Johanna Spalding
One Session – June 4th (Saturday)
Time: 10:00 – 3:00
Class fee: $30.00 paid to Instructor
Class size limited to 10 students.
This session includes an informative and detailed lecture on different methods of preparing wool. The session turns into a hands-on class as students will have the opportunity to use cards, carders and hand combs to create batts and roving. Don’t miss this opportunity to learn how and why certain processes are necessary to prepare fibers.
Samples of completed batts and roving will also be available to view and purchase.
I am just so excited and wanted to share this with everyone. Today I am feeling very much alive and feeling great! I have some really good ideas I can not wait until the weekend to work on! I hope everyone has a great weekend!
Tuesday, May 3, 2011
Oh those Moody, Moody Moods...
I thought I was doing so much better. I was starting to feel terrific. I was thinking about work, my fiber/yarn work that is. My life, happy things. Then yesterday I had a day that was very emotional. It turned into one of those crying all day and all night ones. Im not even sure why I was crying. I thought it was one reason but then I would start crying over something else. I woke up this morning with my eyes very swollen from all the crying.
Today though I was feeling more sort of blah.. Not good but not bad you know just sort of here. I think maybe I just really needed to cry and so yesterday my body said yep its time to turn that faucet on and I think we will just let it run for awhile. Today it decided to turn it off and turn on the body here but brain vacated. I have been forgetful all day. I was supposed to give my orders to my friend and she was going to take them to the post office today. I was in such a fog I just forgot. Not that she would have been able to take them anyway because of how flooded everything is around here (but thats a whole other story and its on all the weather I think). Today I went to the temp job did the work and came home. Been doing fibery things for the past few hours. Only now remembered to tell everyone in my group that I did not get the packages sent out. My head is just not here today. Tomorrow who knows?
I think I am just always going to be moody. Not the boohoohoo type. The happy/sad/mad/happy type. Its just how I have always been. I have been medicated for it before but I lose parts of myself creatively and personality wise and turn into a zombie. Also we decided to go off all meds when we decided to actively try to get pregnant. We went off of them in advance even to make sure they were well out of my system. So the moods are just here too stay. There are just not any instant cures. Feelings have to process and somethings hang around longer than others or come back a few times to stay a bit. Its all part of life.
Now on the Improving part of me I talked to RoLynn today of Enchanted Yarn and Fiber. I will be doing a Fiber Workshop in her store. She is going to put it in her newsletter. It will be from 10am -3pm on Jun 4th. We moved the date today due to the weather and to give us more time to prepare and promote it. I will probably do a blog just for it later this week with a link to her shop. I just wanted to mention it because it was a good part of today and its always nice to talk to RoLynn! She is a really sweet lady. I have really been looking forward to this class too so its pretty happy for me. So with that I will say goodnight on a happy note. Sweet dreams all!
Today though I was feeling more sort of blah.. Not good but not bad you know just sort of here. I think maybe I just really needed to cry and so yesterday my body said yep its time to turn that faucet on and I think we will just let it run for awhile. Today it decided to turn it off and turn on the body here but brain vacated. I have been forgetful all day. I was supposed to give my orders to my friend and she was going to take them to the post office today. I was in such a fog I just forgot. Not that she would have been able to take them anyway because of how flooded everything is around here (but thats a whole other story and its on all the weather I think). Today I went to the temp job did the work and came home. Been doing fibery things for the past few hours. Only now remembered to tell everyone in my group that I did not get the packages sent out. My head is just not here today. Tomorrow who knows?
I think I am just always going to be moody. Not the boohoohoo type. The happy/sad/mad/happy type. Its just how I have always been. I have been medicated for it before but I lose parts of myself creatively and personality wise and turn into a zombie. Also we decided to go off all meds when we decided to actively try to get pregnant. We went off of them in advance even to make sure they were well out of my system. So the moods are just here too stay. There are just not any instant cures. Feelings have to process and somethings hang around longer than others or come back a few times to stay a bit. Its all part of life.
Now on the Improving part of me I talked to RoLynn today of Enchanted Yarn and Fiber. I will be doing a Fiber Workshop in her store. She is going to put it in her newsletter. It will be from 10am -3pm on Jun 4th. We moved the date today due to the weather and to give us more time to prepare and promote it. I will probably do a blog just for it later this week with a link to her shop. I just wanted to mention it because it was a good part of today and its always nice to talk to RoLynn! She is a really sweet lady. I have really been looking forward to this class too so its pretty happy for me. So with that I will say goodnight on a happy note. Sweet dreams all!